House M.D. - Season 1, Episode 2

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On your right. On your right. On your right
On your right.
On your right. On your right.
Back, back, back, back, back. Come on, buddy
Back, back, back, back, back.
Come on, buddy.
Yeah, Dan! Yeah!
Yeah, Dan! Yeah!
Yea! Yea!
Yea!
Yea!
Back, back, back, back, back. Watch the winger!
Back, back, back, back, back.
Watch the winger!
Yeah!
Yeah!
You okay?
You okay?
Dan? Dan, talk to me
Dan? Dan, talk to me.
Dan. Dan
Dan. Dan.
Get a doctor!
Get a doctor!
Hey. Close the door
- Hey.
- Close the door.
Close the door
Close the door.
Is Cuddy down the hall counting to 50?
Is Cuddy down the hall
counting to 50?
She knows I'm in here, in the clinic, as she commanded
She knows I'm in here,
in the clinic, as she commanded.
She just doesn't know I'm alone. Well, you've got a full waiting room
- She just doesn't know I'm alone.
- Well, you've got a full waiting room.
How long do you think you can ignore them? I'm off at 4:00
- How long do you think you can ignore them?
- I'm off at 4:00.
You're doing this to avoid five minutes of work?
You're doing this
to avoid five minutes of work?
If I go out there, I get assigned a kid with a runny nose
If I go out there, I get assigned
a kid with a runny nose.
That's 30 seconds looking at the nose, 25 minutes talking to a worried mom
That's 30 seconds looking at the nose,
25 minutes talking to a worried mom...
who won't leave until she's sure it's not meningitis or a tumor
who won't leave until she's sure
it's not meningitis or a tumor.
Yes. Concerned parents can be so annoying
Yes. Concerned parents
can be so annoying.
Just tell Cuddy you've got an urgent case. You had to leave early. That would be lying
Just tell Cuddy you've got an urgent
case. You had to leave early.
That would be lying.
And that would be wrong. But luckily the definition of "urgent" is fungible
And that would be wrong. But luckily
the definition of "urgent" is fungible.
Not the definition of "case" though
Not the definition
of "case" though.
You have no cases?
You have no cases?
You have no cases?
You have no cases?
You've got handpicked doctors-- specialists--
You've got handpicked
doctors-- specialists--
working for you, and they're sitting on their hands?
working for you,
and they're sitting on their hands?
Cameron's answering my mail. Oh, time well spent, I'm sure
- Cameron's answering my mail.
- Oh, time well spent, I'm sure.
Foreman and Chase?
Foreman and Chase?
Research?
Research?
Nine letters. Iodine deficiency in children
Nine letters.
Iodine deficiency in children.
Cretinism
Cretinism.
So, 4:03 p.m., Dr. House checks out
So, 4:03 p.m.,
Dr. House checks out.
Please write that down
Please write that down.
Dr. House. Sorry. Done for the day
Dr. House.
Sorry. Done for the day.
Plenty of docs here to take care of you. But we had an appointment
Plenty of docs here
to take care of you.
But we had an appointment.
Nice try, but this is a walk-in clinic, which means there are no appointments
Nice try, but this is
a walk-in clinic, which means
there are no appointments.
You walk in, sign the chart, and a doctor will see you
You walk in, sign the chart,
and a doctor will see you.
Just not me. Your letter says that we'd see you
Just not me.
Your letter says that we'd see you.
Not a big letter writer. Here
Not a big letter writer.
Here.
When did my signature get so girlie?
When did my signature get so girlie?
I can explain. See that "G"?
- I can explain.
- See that "G"?
See how it makes a big loop on top?
See how it makes a big loop on top?
Doesn't even look like my handwriting. Think I have something?
Doesn't even look like my handwriting.
Think I have something?
What's the differential diagnosis for writing G's like a junior high school girl?
What's the differential diagnosis
for writing G's like
a junior high school girl?
It's impossible to get to you through normal channels. They have called, e-mailed
It's impossible to get to you
through normal channels.
They have called, e-mailed.
Perseverance does not equal worthiness. Next time you want to get my attention, wear something fun
Perseverance does not equal worthiness.
Next time you want to get my attention,
wear something fun.
Low-rider jeans are hot
Low-rider jeans are hot.
Sixteen-year-old male. Sudden onset of double vision and night terrors, with no apparent cause
Sixteen-year-old male. Sudden onset
of double vision and night terrors,
with no apparent cause.
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